Who knew
by Saishun
Summary: Callan has a sad sad past but will he get over it? Who was his late wife?  It's better then it sounds, I promise.  Disclaimer: I don't own anything.


Authors note: This is my take on Captain Callan's past:))

I STRONGLY recommend you listen to "Who knew" by Pink as you read this. Please!

I hope you enjoy reading this!

Onto the story!

Callan got dressed for work at Providence. He was getting up from a depressing sleep. As he pulled the Providence uniform over his head, he shook off the sleep. He needed to get his head in the game.

He was about to walk through the door when his eyes landed on a picture of him and a girl with blond hair and bright green eyes. They were smiling and he had his arms around her. She had one of those cowboy hats on her head, about to fall off as the laughter coming out of her mouth echoed through his head.

Callan picked up the picture, memories flooding through his head.

That day was clear and cool. It was one of the cooler days of Houston, and they were just coming back from a trail ride. It was the early days of their marriage and they had just found out that she was pregnant. She was so happy about it. She had wanted a kid for ages, ever since they graduated together from high school, being the sweet hearts of the class.

They had been so careful.

Callan put the picture back on the dresser after a second. He wanted to go back to those days.

The days where everything seemed perfect.

He walked out the door and to morning debriefing. When he got there, Rex was sitting next to a fellow operative who also happened to be his girlfriend. Holiday and Six were standing behind them, ready for the meeting to start.

Callan stood and half listened as he remembered when he and his wife were their age, going steady in high school. He chuckled as he reminisced, feeling like such an oldie.

He remembered when he had first asked her out. He had been as nervous as a cat in a room full of dogs since they were pretty close friends. Callan remembered the numerous dates they had gone on, remembering each on with careful detail.

He remembered his first date, too much cologne and a frustrating half an hour messing with a hopeless cowlick. Nevertheless, he had gotten through it with a kiss at the end.

Then he remembered one of the last dates before he had proposed. Callan chuckled slightly and shook his head as the others looked at each other and shrugged, slightly concerned.

Him and his wife, girlfriend at the time, had gone to a horse auction together. In all reality, it wasn't _really _a date. They had gone to pick out a new horse for his ranch. She had fallen in love with a small white filly with black "stockings" and a brown bow shaped marking under her ear and black hair.

It had cost an arm and a leg but he did it for her.

About a week later, he had proposed with that horse. It took many countless (and frustrating) hours filled with treats to get the horse to come with a slight signal with the ring box balanced on its nose.

He still had that horse. He was renting a stall at a nearby ranch. About 5 miles from Providence.

Callan walked out from morning debriefing quickly, wanting to go quickly before an Evo alert came up. Holiday caught up with him and put one hand on his shoulder and a one hand on his forehead, feeling his temperature.

"Are you okay Callan?" Holiday asked, slightly concerned.

"Just fine, doctor." Callan said with a sad smile as he shook off the doctor and walked to the hangar, to get his car.

He drove about 7 minutes to the ranch. He parked his red pickup and got out, locking the door. Slowly, he walked up to the stall where an elderly horse was eating a mouthful of hay.

"Hey girl." Callan said quietly as he put both his hands on her neck and petted her. The horse's name was Henrietta. His wife had named her after the rich southern belle that she had seen in an old movie once.

He rubbed her down and brushed her. Callan took an apple out of pocket and let Henrietta eat it from his fingers, her mouth searching for more.

Callan chuckled and gave her a pat.

"No more from me, girl." He said while laughing.

He gave her a final pat and drove into town, wanting to buy something from the store.

After he bought what he needed, he was going back to the base. Callan was at a stoplight with his window down, when he looked out to see where the yelling was coming from. He couldn't help from staring when a woman was yelling and going ballistic on a man. Several men from inside the store were going to restrain her as she kept screaming at the man. He spaced out, looking at the scene.

She reminded him of his wife.

He jolted back to reality as he heard honking and saw several cars pass him.

"Shoot." He said as he pulled over and leaned back in his seat, closing his eyes and letting out a breath.

Callan sighed and opened them again, just in time to see the woman go Evo.

He quickly got out of the car, called Six on his comlink, and grabbed a gun from his seat. The woman hadn't turned into a big Evo, but she wasn't small either. She was about 10 feet tall and she had a big green body with a black beak and claws. The people around him scattered as he started shooting at the Evo. He kept at it for a few minutes, dodging her attempts at hitting him, until he got distracted from the arrival of Six and Rex.

The Evo knocked him back and made a tear into his arm, then kicked him back.

Callan hit the building with a thump and slumped down to the ground. He closed his eyes and rested, remembering his wife.

She had gone insane, yelling and crying, trying to block everything out after their first child was born dead. She had been so upset.

One time, he came home on a particularly cold day, at least as cold as it could get in Texas, at 6 pm wearing a light beige colored sweater and jeans, and she was sitting in the kitchen, all the dishes smashed.

He could usually calm her down but this time she wouldn't. She kept screaming at him. She threw a handful of glass, not noticing her own pain, and a particularly sharp piece nicked his eye, making that scar.

Eventually he had to pick her up, her struggling, and get her out of the pools of broken glass in the kitchen. Then he called back the scientific facility that had asked him if they could observe her for research and keep her there for tests. And he was allowed to visit under for certain conditions.

As they came to pick her up that night, excited to have someone agree, they carried her out, her screaming at him all the way out.

Callan watched them drive off through the window and sat there silently. Eventually, he got up and got a dustpan. He scooped up all the pieces and threw them in the trash.

When he was finished, he leaned against the cabinets and then slid down to the floor, his legs bended and his arms resting against his knees, as tears slid down his face.

He missed her already.

Callan snapped back from the memory as someone shook his shoulder. He looked up and saw Six.

"Glad to see you, agent." Callan said with a smirk as Six helped him up.

"You should go get checked." Six said as he raised an eyebrow, looking at the torn uniform and deep cut.

"Yeah. I will. Thanks."

The wound was bleeding but he could make it back to base in his car.

As he parked his car and locked it, he started walking to the lab, shoes scuffing the floor, looking like a lost child. Callan remembered to bring the item he had bought in the bag. It reminded him of his wife.

Callan remembered back to the visits he used to go to see his wife.

She wouldn't eat and she wouldn't sleep. Her body was frail and she screamed and lunged violently at anyone who came close. Her bright eyes were dull and hurt filled.

On those visits, she was locked in a room with a big glass window for observation. He would just look and watch her for hours on end and she would bang against the glass, screaming.

When he came on his last visit, she was in bed, an I.V. bag attached to her, keeping her alive since she wouldn't eat. She was exhausted and dying.

He looked sadly through the observing window, his hands pressed against the glass, wanting to hold her but as she pulled the needle keeping her from dying out of her arm.

He had done nothing to stop her as scientists ran past him, not believing it even though he had just watched her kill herself.

He slumped down and cried shamelessly.

Callan put a hand over his eyes and tilted his face to the ceiling, keeping the tears from flowing.

He turned the corner and ran into someone.

He opened his eyes and blinked as papers fluttered everywhere. Classic Callan.

"Oh no!" Shouted a woman with a southern twang… just like his.

She had blonde hair and she was in a lab coat, her big wire rimmed glasses sliding down the bridge of her nose. She bent down to pick up the papers. The scientist and Callan mumbled sorrys as she scooped up the papers. Callan picked up a few papers and gave them to her. Their eyes connected and he saw that she had hazel eyes.

The scientist blushed and put all her papers in one arm as she stuck out the other.

"I'm Laura. I'm supposed to be the new medical assistant." She said as he shook her hand.

Laura's eyes drifted to his arm and her eyes widened.

"I could patch that up for you if you'd like." She said, pointing timidly at his arm.

"Yeah. I'd like that… Just give me a second." He said as he smiled slightly.

She walked down the hall and to the lab.

Callan walked into his room and took the thing out of the bag, throwing the bag into the trash.

He set down a single yellow rose onto his dresser in front of the picture of them together.

"I miss you Kathy." He whispered as he walked out the door.


End file.
